Relationships makes the world go ‘round. Take away all the materialistic items in your life and all you have left are the relationships you have cultivated with others. Besides my family and husband, my favorite people in my life are my girlfriends. When we get together, the stresses of my life seem to melt away. It’s an amazing and beautiful thing to be friends with women who you have gone through some of the most memorable moments of your life. When you have found a true friend- time will only make things better between you. Just as I have matured, grown, and changed, so have my girlfriends and so has our friendship. And even though I still feel like a teenager when I am with them, there are still some major ways our interactions have changed (for the better) over the years:
We used to….
Call each other to talk about a crazy sleepless night at a club and ask advice about boys
Call each other to talk about a crazy sleepless night with a newborn and ask advice about sleep training
Discuss the pros and cons of “bad boys”
Discuss the pros and cons of investment property
Shop for club tops, dresses, and heels that made us feel sexy
Shop for suit jackets and shoes with a reasonable heel that make us feel responsible
Celebrate good grades, college acceptances, and scholarships
Celebrate new jobs, promotions, and degrees
Ask for help with math homework, projects, and essays
Ask for help with taxes, resumes, and 401K’s
Help each other meet cute guys who would eventually break our hearts
Help each other network with people who can take us forward in our careers
Pose for pictures at prom
Pose for pictures at weddings
Get together to play with a new puppy
Get together to welcome a new baby
Plan sleepovers and house parties
Plan bachelorette parties and baby showers
Pregame with shots while getting ready together and go out to a club around 11pm
Finish a bottle or two of wine while talking and catching up and head home around 11 pm
These are just a few of the ways my relationships with my girlfriends have evolved over the years. Still, there is one thing that has always remained the same, and that is our support for one another. Even as teenagers, we didn’t spend a lot of our time hating on each other. Our goal was to have fun together and enjoy each others' company, and as we got older that goal changed to raising each other up and being supportive of each others' goals and dreams. Today, my girlfriends are the first people I deliver good news to after family, because they know everything I’ve gone through and how far I have come. We are proud of accomplishments and continue to push and encourage each other to go further than we ever thought we could. Being in committed friendships for over a decade takes work, and the relationships we have forged over the years are definitely not perfect. We still argue and get mad with each other. We may go long periods of time without seeing each other or communicating, but when we come back together we pick up where we left off, as if no time has passed at all.
So, if I can offer a piece of advice, it’s this: when looking back at your friendships, any woman that you’re still friends with should be someone who has continually lifted your spirits, not brought you down. She should be someone who has always been excited about your success. There is no room for jealousy in a lasting friendship. My girlfriends and I are all at different points in our life; some of us are married, some still single, some in long term relationships. Some of us have kids, some don’t. Some of us have college and graduate degrees. You can make a long list of how we all have grown in different directions from where we started as teenagers, but one thing we all have in common is each other.
You see, the thing about girlfriends is- even though time will change your relationship by leaps and bounds, if you continually celebrate each other and support one another, you will always have a friendship worth working for.